I got an e-mail on Saturday morning from my ex-girlfriend telling me she's getting married 'soon'. I was taken completely by surprise. It was a bolt from the blue. She's marrying the same guy she told me she was 'attracted' to before we broke up. There were so many emotions flooding my mind when I first read it, shock, wonder, hurt... I don't know what else. I was caught off guard and it just felt numbing. I felt like a zombie for a couple of hours after that.
For the first time in my life, I felt tired. Tired of what life was throwing at me. The last year has been a real test for me. I thought I did OK with what I had faced earlier. But on Saturday, I was drained. Sometimes the shit gets too much to deal with. It's just that what happened earlier has taken so much out of me that this one felt like the knockout blow.
I'm not feeling sorry for myself at all. I know everyone has their troubles. But it's just that I've run out of a little steam right now. It's the kind of moment when you're on the mat in the boxing ring with the referee counting upto 10 and you're trying desperately to get back on your feet.
I'm pooped. Yet, I know I'll be back stronger.