Friday, October 31, 2008

The Road to Recovery

It's been a sad couple of weeks. Last Wednesday, I had my first real sports injury, a partial hamstring tear and on Friday, I lost my mum-in-law to be.

The hamstring injury keeps me away from running for about 3 weeks, just when I was beginning to get some rhythm after a considerable break from long-distance running. And poof! My hamstring goes bust. In the midst of dealing with it, and it is a HUGE deal to me to miss marathon prep, my fiancee's ma passed away.

That took the wind out of my sails. And it was so sudden! Everything happened in a day, just like when Papa passed away over two years ago. It was really sad, even more so because she'll miss the wedding in a couple of months.

I'll be honest here. I didn't get to know her as well as I'd liked to, but we got on well. We'd make fun of my fiancee together, talk about cricket a little and exchange pleasantries. She was extremely warm and treated me like a son. I'll miss not having her around.

My fiancee's been very strong about it and I'm proud of her, but I won't write more about that here to respect her privacy. I think people's feelings on the loss of someone very dear should be kept private unless they volunteer to speak/write about it.

We've spent the last week dealing with the loss as a family and it's been tough. Like all such losses, I know this is one we will never fully get over. That's just the way death is. It leaves you wondering what just happened. Especially when it hits you so suddenly.

You wonder if everything you shared was a big dream. Those family holidays, the day your parent slapped you for doing something wrong, the surprisingly good report card you turned in every once in a while (read, 5 years in my case)... it feels like a different life. Surreal.

Where did they all go...

Thursday, October 02, 2008

In other news...

...I get married in December. To someone I met at my old office. :)

It's been on the cards for a bit now. I just didn't want to come out and say it until I felt everything was in place and the time was right. Especially after what happened with my previous broken engagement and various other failed relationships. Shit, that makes me sound like a wreck!

But anyway, it is what it is. :)

Exciting Times!

I've really missed writing here for a while. It's been, mainly, because I've been busy getting my fledgling company off the ground. Hiring people, getting the website up, trying to get business... the works.

It's been excellent learning. Irrespective of how it eventually ends up, I'm so so soooo glad I've taken the chance to pursue my dream. There seems to be a romance to life now. I can feel the idealism and belief, dormant for so long, creeping back into my life. There's no better feeling than stepping out of my comfort zone and into the realm of the unknown.

Everyday begins with hopes or recovering from the previous day's disappointments. It's a roller-coaster. I guess it teaches you to enjoy life for what it is, not what you want it to be.

If there's one lesson I've learnt in these past few weeks, it's this, don't take anything for granted. The new hire who says he'll join in 3 days but doesn't turn up, the potential client who promises you a lot but comes up with nothing... the list is endless. I'm not being cynical here, just realistic. There's many a slip betwixt the cup and the lip. :)

The more I think about it, the more I feel that we're little players in this humungous play of destiny. No matter how much we may want something and work hard for it, if it isn't in your destiny, there's really nothing you can do about it. I think it's acceptance that has taught me to love life as it is.

It's a big change from where I was four years ago, but I think it's a change for the better.